okay , uni? sucks. i dont know why i just dont feel like going there suddenly. Haih. someone pls shoot me in the head. and ym buzz's are super duper annoying. so anyway, i am considered promiscuous by some people. Why? I dont know. Do i even flirt around? Hahaha guess not, but on second thoughts, hehehe ;). But someone swept me off my feet wey. gile la. i felt like *silent moment* then eerything stopped. chewahh. Well, it happens i guess. Lets see if it happens for the second time then maybe its a sign ahhha :P well well i dont know whats happening to me, suddenly i felt life is such a pain in the booty. Aku rasa tak best arini because something popped in my head. sangat disturbia & for the first time i felt sangat "wtf yo". taktau kenape la kan, tapi rasa centu ar.

This life never seemed complete and i am never satisfied with things. I wished for a happy ending, nothing seems to turn out happy lak. cipet tol. Hmmm i wanna apply for scholarship la kan. Kot kot dapat, gile best. mahsyuuuk. Havin another arghhh moment now. I wanna make love right na na na ~ ahahhha. Not exactly make love ar, cam takde keje je. So anyway, i tak faham kenaapa la orang selalu sngat salah faham and fikir lain2 kan. Layan ar david guetta sayang oi. David guetta cakap, love is gone haha love in uniersal terms eh. Life is just so" pffffft" at times. When you're in the batter's box, you want to swing for the fence. But the fact is ? Sometimes you just cant. Next! i dah ada assignment and omigosh. i bole la jugak pening because the people aint the friendliest person on earth there in uni. sucks tahap dewa dowh. kawan pon cam ikhlas x ikhlas je. umm ok esok, history. hmmm. i kinda wrote something-something to express how i kinda feel at the moment. nanti i hantar tot he next post. Hmm well im goin to o.u right na na na~ with mommy dearest, cari sandals because sandals i punye tali dah putuiiihhh naa. cilaks. huhu.

Love,
me.

ps* i miss you kot :)

Malam ini
berjalan jauh aku di setiap persinghan kenangan
Untuk aku renung kembali catatan cinta lama
Membaca semula setiap kenangan di setiap persinggahan
Ada sebuah persingahan yang tidak mungkin pudar catatannya
Di suatu sebuah pesingahan di hujung kenangan
Juga terpahat catatan yang terpahat di batu hati ini
Ketukan pahat kata yang tajam dan kuat
Telah menghancurkan hati ini sehebatnya
Untuk nokhtahkan satu perhubungan cinta.
Namun, mashiku bawa cintamu di dalam bekas hatiku
Setiap kali bulan dan bentari berganti
Begitu resah aku menghindar bayangmu
Malam ini bulan datang lagi dan aku tak pernah mengerti
Mengapa tika waktu terus berjalan dan aku harus menungumu
Sedangkan cintaku telah kau pahat nokhtanya di hatiku.

ehmm.

ps * Now i know u all think im a hati batu , cold hearted bitch and ganas kan, then.. bila baca what i post macam some emo bitch and all, HELLO i'm a normal human being. I have feelings. I deserve to be emotional at times right? Hahahha. So much for "rollercoaaaaaaaaster". So i went out aritu with fifi, nas, far-it and fart-in. Lepak dalam kereta cam apa je pusing rolling and laughing. My last box of rox, left in fee's car aritu, sorry babe. Heheh. Shit the whole rat poison thingy got me scared bebehh. So a few days to go to either bliss or nightmare lah kan. Ive been david guetta-ing myselg and its sooo good, loooooove is goooneee! sexy gitu lagu dia. So today is xmas eve and i have no plans besides family and all. Apakah? Clubbing? Or lepaking with the rest of the folks? Hmmm nanti kita lihat. ANyway harini uitm called my mom, she said that i was gonna be gugur-ed if i dont send my transcripts to them and i am puzzled because no one called my mobile number and indeed i dont see the need to rush it BUT my father ni laaaa, lembab nak bank in and i am so gonna screw the college people for my ptptn thingy. Should have went after my medical check up tadi but i was too tired and i havent eaten plus i think i pusing-ed satu GH because kereta park jauh gila. So i was abit burnt today, sunburn la. Pakai hitam lak tu. giler mourning kan colour dia. Finished workin at acp mags. Really good nice people with real experience and carrier, makes me inspired by the way they work. That is what i call independent woman dowhhh. It was a great experience for me and learning things like that seriously gives me more ideas and other things and opens up my mind a lil. chewah now i sound so kononly pro. some weird incident happen tadi and seriously i find it like kemalangan seriiiuuuuuusssss beb! ahahah m gona miss the ahjayyy wei. Shes nice and damn friendly. Well whatta do. risau babi la pasal my uitm ni. hmmmm shitneszoo. oooh sometimes people can be so fake and such a great liar, they dont realize that they have th word lie written all over them. Freak. ape la kau ingat aku bendul sangat tak tau apape ke. Tolong la wei. I was young and naive once, not anymore. Thats just straight up wrong and menyakitkan hati sangat namanya. hahaha. I gotta go get ready now. xmas xmas yo. Love youuuu and muahmuah ya'll.

xoxo.

judul-less.

Ada yang berduka dan gembira
kau biarkan meraka berhibur
sedang diri mu derita ditanggung
senyum wajah mu disebalik duka.
Ingin sekali kumenghampiri
memulakan bicara kata,
berbual mesra,
namun hajatku tak pernah
kesampaian
kerna sifat malu seorang wanita
masih menebal dalam diri
Ingin sekali kuselami
lubuk hatinya
meleraikan misteri
membebaskan kekecewaan lalu
aku ingin sekali melepaskan
belengu hatinya
dan membangkitkan kembali
ghairah kehidupannya.
Walaupun kau di selatan, aku di barat,
Setiap pagi, bila kita bagun dari tidur,
kita lihat langit yang sama,
Walaupun seksa mu lama dan aku seketika,
Kau sungguh berusaha dan aku mencuba,
Tapi kita derita perkara yang sama.


wtf!?!?!?! tergantung, i used to be able to finish up these missing words. ooh no, this means!! i have lost my "soft" side.
this is why i dont really write in bm.. it ends up to be cacated.

: (

counting the days .. not knowing the answer.. im confused la.. am i still yours? do you still have feelings for me? Whats the real reason b? someone else perhaps? I had my hopes up so high hmmm, we've reached this far, and you wanna let it go ? I just miss u so much, thats why i jadi tak betul. Hmmm. When the drama in your life is over and you still love this girl who's waiting, tell me. Dont make me wait too long. I love you.